I did it, I swear that it was one of the worst experiences of my life. Shame I only have to repeat it every two fucking weeks for the next six months.
So, how it all go down then? Wed-Nes-Day:-
From the last blog we knew I was going to have to deal with a needle or two until I have my port installed some point next week. Well, I go onto Ward 10 at the Q.E. in Gateshead. I’ll say it again, they’re a right bunch of characters in Ward 10. They’re predominantly nurse led, so no one telling them to put their serious heads on? I dunno, but I actually like and welcome the informality? I guess is where I am going with that.
Anyways, everyone is friendly and says ‘ello and bye to each other when they’ve finished treatment. I sit down and have a long cannula installed, luckily they do seem to use the super thin pediatrics ones, I then have a nurse sit with me and explain how I am going to be connected to two different sets of Chemo, should take about an hour. Then I get connected to the last one that I will take home for 2 days and then come back and get disconnected.
Okay, that’s what I am signed up for, then lets do this. So I get connected and well… that’s about the last time I felt a scrap of normality.
Jesus Christ save me!
This is like nothing I have ever experienced in my life… Yeah, funny that, you’ve never pumped poison intravenously into your body? No not what I mean.
It was the instant 0-100% sick feeling. From the very second I was connected to the bag I was sick. It felt like I was being injected with heat.
I think I managed about 20-30 minutes before I had to ask them to stop. I was overheating like crazy though I wasn’t.
I was doing so well with holding back the nausea but there’s only so much you can take and then I folded. I called the Nurse over and they press the stop button and it turns out that it’s about 1 in 3 that get this reaction.
So… It turns out I need to have atropine before all chemotherapy sessions.
“A drug used to block nerve stimulation of muscles and glands and relax smooth muscles. It is also used to increase heart rate, reduce secretions, and treat the effects of certain poisons. It is a type of antimuscarinic agent and a type of tropane alkaloid.”
Sadly, there is absolutely no way to know this until you have had your first session. I have heard that even with the port installed. I need to have an injection before. Every. Session.
Bollocks! I’m sick of saying I hate needles. No having more doesn’t make it easier, it’s just another thing for the pile!
Well, I can now get reconnected again, the hot feeling is back but I am not feeling the nausea I was before. Okay… lets get the rest of this done then.
They come round with a food trolley, soup, sammiches and pudding was custard Kerry said. There was no way in hell I was going to be eating any of it so I politely declined lying that I would “get something to eat on my way home.”
The chemotherapy just seemed to make me want to go to the bathroom, like repeatedly. I think I went 4 times in 3-4 hours we spent there. I think it’s about a 3 hours in.
I’ve seen some people in and out in the time it’s taken me. I’d not concerning, more something to note.
I get the all clear to get my pump fitted next. That’s this boy:-
Sadly, I was overheating and my sweat seems to digest the glue in the medical dressings. The alternative was basically to bandage it down and tape it to me. We will see with the introduction of Atropine into all of my sessions if the overheating is going to be a continued thing.
I am sent home with two new drugs. Basically anti diarrhea and sickness tablets. Take this one twice a day for 2 days, the other twice a day for 1 day.
Blah blah. More pills just put the information they give me into my medisafe app. I’d be utterly lost without this app. Even before adding chemotherapy into the mix. This thing beeps at you and tells you what to take and how many to take. Whether it’s with food, or whether you have to chew the pill or not.
We take the very long, slow walk back to the car. I think I have to stop once to use the rest room and vomit again. Something that’s going to become a theme of the next 48 hours. Kerry drives us home and I really honestly don’t remember much of the next 24 hours. I know I kept leaving my stupid pump bottle on a shelf or on the table or the dog’s tail would catch the tube and near rip it out of my arm! oh the swearwords. Gladly it was bandaged to me so I think it helped a lot. I can remember that I couldn’t sleep in bed. I think I paced the flat a lot. I know I did doze off in one of the recliners in the living room. I know I watched some YouTube at my computer in the office but the morning came and Kerry woke up, she had to work so cracked on but I spent the majority of Thursday on the couch watching shite TV on Netflix and trying to keep any food and water down.
I bailed out of going to the gym with Kerry, I bailed out of going with climbing with Kerry, I also bailed out of the dog walk too. Walking too and from the bathroom was about the exercise I got all day. I can remember going to bed and sleeping the full night through with Kerry till Friday morning.
Friday: Okay so I woke up, I think I put out something on facebook that I didn’t have long left before the disconnection and I was looking forward to it. Well, I spent the most of the day sorting out a big delivery that came:-
My Complementary treatment meds arrived. Yet again. More stuff to program into my MediSafe app and for all it looks a lot. It’s actually 4 medicines, one of which I can’t take for the first month and when I do, I alternate it with another drug. So we shall see how I get one with these.
That does make me on everything currently. There’s nothing I have in the pipeline at this time.
Friday afternoon is looming, I head up to the Q.E. for my disconnection. I see a new set of nurses and they disconnect that bloody bottle of hell off me. Pull out the deep cannula and discuss the last 48 hours with me.
One thing I will make clear. They just want you to call them, talk to them. Discuss with them how it’s going, it’s part of the job and I am too British, I SHOULD have called them multiple times as there is stuff that they can do. Why didn’t I contact them constantly going through my mind.
Anyways, suffice to say, all of the nausea I had been feeling wouldn’t have been so bad as they would have sent me to my GP, pick up a prescription of anti sickness tablets. Simples…
Well, suffice to say then sent me home with the new anti sickness tablets. I was able to go home. Have a normal Friday night, kinda, I had some soup I had planned on eating a pizza but I didn’t feel like I could eat it.
I did bollocks up though, I went to bed without taking all of my tablets. So I woke up this morning feeling like hell. I’ve learned my lessons.
Pain Today: 4/10 (I know it’s there, just other things to occupy my mind.
Mood Today: If the world would stop me feeling sick I’d be grateful
Appetite Today: Utterly non-existant Wednesday through Friday, a little came back on Saturday
Weight: 192.9 lbs / 87.5 KG